Holiday time can be stressful time of year
Posted on Thursday, November 20, 2008
To see a world in a grain of sand:
This time of year begins a period which has become a time of stressful expectation as well as a welcome anticipation. There is pressure to shop, entertain, be celebratory, cook, travel, visit, give and receivegifts, and overextend ourselves financially and emotionally. An ideal image of perfect occasions has led to many a let-down when it turns out nothing can be perfect. The holiday gathering that becomes a free-for-all accusatory visit has become a sad, classic, “ entertainment” plot for too many movies and television shows.
We actually do have much for which to be thankful. But the most sincere gratitudes are generated not by force or expectation or requirement. Please join me in an attempt to not rush the season, but instead to take the time we here in the United States have designated to give thanks.
Last week, I listed eight words which are used to define the word thankful. Two of those synonyms are “ happy” and “ pleased. ” These words seem more self-centered than others I’ve used. “ Grateful, appreciative, and relieved” are usually reactions to external events and somehow more in keeping with a period of thanksgiving. But let’s examine this.
Recall the most recent time you sincerely thought, “ I feel happy” or “ I am pleased. ” Most likely your next motivation was to share that feeling with someone else. If you did express it and they caught the sheer joy which you imparted, it would have been hard for them not to extend that feeling to another. The positive domino effect at work. It is in this way that we are able to bear our sorrows, heal from our wounds, and gain strength to face our fears.
For that, we can be very thankful. So, here’s a wish for all of us. I’d be pleased if you and yours are happy this holiday season.
Look it up:
I credit the Missouri Department of Conservation’s NATURAL EVENTS CALENDAR for a lot of the information I share with you about our region’s insects, birds, plants, animals and wild life. Missouri’s events and Northwest Arkansas’s are much the same, with a variation primarily of timing - either a week or two before or after - depending on the season. If you’d like to follow along, all you have to do is get your own copy of the Calendar. They are available for around $ 5 plus shipping from Nature Shop, Missouri Department of Conservation, PO Box 180, Jefferson City, MO 65102-0180, call toll free at 877-521-8632, or you can order online now at www. mdcnatureshop. com. There’s something really different about a day when you wake up, take notice of the date, and also become aware of some of the following facts: April 18: Whippoorwills begin calling. January 14: Snow fleas are visible on snow in sunny wooded areas. July 9: Bird song has subsided; birds are busy raising young. September 9: Peak of blue-winged teal migration.
The Calendar gives you a headsup call, too, when you scan ahead and read this note: “ Look for ‘ frost flowers’ with the first hard frost. ” That’s something we are getting ready to experience this week. On the MDC calendar, the date is November 13 th. It also has a note last week about groundhogs already being asleep underground. But I just saw one today, grazing along the highway right of way, poking his head up over the grass hummocks to stare at the cars.
What’s fun about the Missouri calendar being a little off our area’s timing is making a note about when our events happen. I also have shared these calendars with my family in South Arkansas and Texas. We find it very interesting, almost a game, to see how much time passes before an event which “ starts” here turns up there. It works the opposite way in the spring, as warm weather affects their region first. And then there are the unexpected influences, like late spring freezes and hurricanes.
It’s also fascinating to start your own calendar. A simple, easy way to put together your own regional natural events occurrences is to just start, anytime. Note in the space on a calendar, or notebook you keep handy by the window, each day’s activities in the world of nature outside your house.
You get to choose what to notice. Some may decide to track one thing - the morning and evening temperatures, if it was sunny or windy - the weather conditions. Or you may choose to observe sky conditions only, cloud formations, stars and planets sighted. Maybe the things which are blooming or beginning to migrate, the birds, insects or animals around you, will be of interest. Where the sun and moon rise in relation to your porch or the room you sleep or eat in.
Of course in doing this, each of us has to take a moment to pause, to notice, to write, and to be aware. It only takes a moment but a habit developed for this purpose can change our day, possibly our lives, certainly our health. Just another exercise of stress reduction. Like smiling or petting the dog, it makes a difference for the better. And, not only does this give you a progress reference for the next month, but you have begun a record of your world, your day, your self which your descendants would be fascinated to have.
Now that’s something to be thankful for.
------June Baker Jefferson is a fifth generation native of Malvern,
Arkansas. She lives in rural Northwest Arkansas outside of West Fork with her husband, horses, cats, dogs and wildlife. June has taught writing classes and workshops focusing on memoir and personal essay for over 18 years.
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